An In-Depth Look at Army Divorce Rates
An In-Depth Look at Army Divorce Rates
Raleigh, NC-The largest divorce firm in the state, Rosen Law Firm, says they're not surprised by the sharp increase among Army divorce rates and that more needs to be done to counsel the spouses left at home and those deployed overseas."There's a huge difference between typical divorces that we see on a daily basis and the military divorces that we're seeing," says Janet Fritts, a divorce attorney with Rosen Law Firm. "The majority of civilian couples we deal with have stopped communicating somewhere during the marriage, but military couples have been communicating in more ways than ever before."Divorce experts say young military marriages, co-ed military units, financial decision-making, and the bureaucracy of being a military officer's spouse are just some of the factors contributing to the already established problems of spousal absence and combat stress among military families."Allocation of finances is a huge problem because so many military members have no control over their finances when they're overseas and their at-home spouses are spending the monthly checks the way they see fit, sometimes on their new love relationships," says Fritts. With deployments being more frequent and for longer periods, infidelity is another reason why the Army divorce rates have sharply increased. "A lot of times it's the women who remain on base to take care of the children and when her husband is gone for 6 months to a year, she may inevitably make new relationships with the men on the base," says Fritts.Military couples are usually far away from their families and they are not reminded of their marriage vows because they are so isolated on base or overseas. Fritts also explains the growing co-ed military units are not helping either as more military members are establishing relationships with the opposite sex during wartime.Statistics show the largest increase recently in Army divorce rates are among officers, a position which Fritts describes as having an enormous responsibility. Coupled with the weight of being an officer, the pressure of being a military officer's spouse also adds to the problem. "When they're left by themselves on the military base once their spouse deploys, a lot of spouses stop playing the game of being nice to the other military officer's spouses," Fritts explains. "Once the deployed spouse returns there's a lot of disagreement on the roles played and the bureaucracy of military officers and their spouses."Rosen Law Firm
4101 Lake Boone Trail, Suite 500
Raleigh, NC 27607
www.rosen.com
"Divorce is Different Here"With offices in Raleigh, Charlotte, and now Chapel Hill/Durham, Rosen Law Firm is the largest divorce firm in North Carolina. Founded in 1990, the firm is dedicated to providing individual growth and support to couples seeking divorce by helping them move forward with their lives. Our staff of attorneys, accountants, and specially trained divorce coaches expertly address the complex issues of ending a marriage. Our innovative approach acknowledges that divorce is so much more than just a legal matter. Specialties include child custody, alimony, property distribution, separation agreements, and domestic violence relief.For more information on Rosen Law Firm, or for an interview, please contact: Alison Kramer, Director of Public Relations, Office: 919-256-1542, Cell: 919-523-7104, akramer@rosen.com, http://www.rosen.com
Ultimate Army Themed Games & Activities for Your Childs Birthday Party
Ultimate Army Themed Games & Activities for Your Childs Birthday Party
Are you looking for the Ultimate Army Themed Party Games and Activities? Well stop looking because they are right here...Good Luck and happy reading..."Water Brigade" For their first high priority assignment, your unit must put out a fire that is destroying civilian crops! Divide the soldiers into two teams; line the teams up next to each other. Put a bucket full of water at the head of each line and give the first person in each line a large cup full of water. Place an empty bucket for each team about 35 ft away. Blow a whistle or say "GO!" the first person runs to the empty bucket, pours the water into it, and races back to their team with the empty cup. They should pass off the cup to the next teammate who fills the cup, runs to the bucket, pours the water in it and brings the cup back for the next player. When each team member has run down and back the game is over. To see which team has carried the most water down, insert sticks into each bucket and compare the water lines."Drill Sergeant Says" This is a simple game of Simon with a twist of Army. Next you are going to need a Drill Sergeant. Any volunteers? Oh yes, we have the honorary Mom and Dad. Try and dress up with a hat, sunglasses and shaved head. To play the game, the Drill Sergeant will give commands like: Drill Sergeant Says run for 10 seconds! You can have them respond with a Yes Drill Sergeant. If the Drill Sergeant didn't say "Drill Sergeant Says" and a few kids keep doing the commands, they have to go down for a few pushups. This really gives the kids the feel of Army-like drills!!"Pack Up Relay" Find or borrow full size backpacks and things that would go inside (canteens, compass, pack of food, plate, etc). You will need one pack per team and one item per person. Have the teams line up with their pack. The first person must run to the pile of item #1 with the pack on, take the pack off, put the item into the pack, put the pack back on and run back to their team. Continue this until each child has picked up at least one item. The kids will love this game because they get to work as a team."Missing In Action (MIA)" Hide plastic Army Men outside and inform your soldiers that there are some fellows Soldiers Missing In Action. Send your soldiers out on a Top Secret Mission to locate and bring back as many plastic Army Men as they can find. You can keep score by how many they bring back."The Balloon Pop" This is a perfect game to get the kids to interact with each other more. Before the party, blow up a bunch of balloons and put a piece of paper inside that has different instructions, such as, "Do 10 Push-ups", "Run 2 Laps", "Do 15 Jumping Jacks", "Tell another soldier to do 15 Jumping Jacks", "Just got Promoted", etc. The kids will love the anticipation of popping a balloon and finding out what their orders are. Have fun and be creative."Rescue the Injured Soldier" Divide up the soldiers into two teams. Provide each team with a gurney (tarp or beach towel) and a roll of toilet paper. One person on the team will be the "Injured Soldier" and should be positioned about 40 yards from his teammates. When you say, "Go" the team runs across the yard to their injured soldier. They first wrap up the injured soldier in toilet paper, then transfer him to the gurney and finally transport him back to their starting position (I would suggest having one child hold a corner). This game is guaranteed to be loads of fun!"Mine Field" Start out by placing a bunch of water balloons in the yard and blindfolding each soldier. Have them try and walk across the minefield without breaking any balloons."Grenade Toss" Before the party, construct some bean bags out of camo fabric and fill them up with rice. You could also purchase beanbags at your local party or fabric store. Place to cement blocks about 3 feet apart and place board on them. Next, setup of different types and sizes of pop bottles for the targets. Give the soldiers the beanbags and let them take aim. Try different distances to increase the difficulty."Water Grenade War" Begin by constructing two barricades for the children to hide behind (these can be made out of cardboard and spray painted for effect). Give the kids the balloons and watch the fun unfold before your eyes. Just remember, you can't have too many grenades!"Obstacle Course" I would suggest placing this game last in your order of Birthday Party Games. This will be the most challenging and exciting. Here are few ideas on different obstacles you could incorporate into your Ultimate Course. Use a board as a plank to run across a water obstacle or between to cement blocks. Get some tires for the soldiers to step or run through. Use 5 gallon buckets with poles taped across for the soldiers to crawl under. Make some obstacles the soldiers can run and weave around, such as, garbage cans or buckets. Throw in some physical exercises like jumping jacks and pushups. While the soldiers are running through the obstacle, make sure you are acting just like a Drill Sergeant. There should be lots of yelling and encouragement. You could also be shooting a water gun at them or throwing water grenades. This should be the Ultimate game, so take your time designing the course and have fun!Don't forget to check out the Ultimate Kid Birthday Parties website and submit your Kid Birthday Party ideas for a chance to win over $500 worth of prizes. The Grand Prize is a Sony Cybershot DSC-P93 Camera. Don't forget, because the contest ends 31 May 2005. Good Luck!!!Geoff Schurman is a proud parent of two toddler boys. He enjoys throwing Ultimate Parties for his kids and wants to give you the resources to help plan an Ultimate Party. He is the webmaster and owner of http://www.ultimate-kid-birthday-parties.com which is an excellent resource to learn about every party detail for a themed birthday party. There are many themes already available for viewing and new ones released every week. To track his experience and new web content, he makes daily entries into his blog at http://www.ultimate-kid-birthday-parties.blogspot.com. Both websites are a great start on fulfilling your child's dream in having an Ultimate Kid Birthday Party this year!
The Holiday Army
The Holiday Army
Here it comes again - the Holiday Army - in its annual march against us. Some of its generals are called "Thanksgiving," "Christmas," "Hanukah," "New Year's Eve" and "New Year's Day." They are no respecters of the heartbroken and emotionally wounded, and their troops are merciless. They take no prisoners! They demand that we participate in their joy and nostalgia or they will mow us down with their militant tanks of holiday spirit.Sometimes they declare their war on us openly - without shame or remorse. Sometimes, they wait for us in ambush. Their intelligence operators have been working diligently all year, waiting for the Thanksgiving Day (or sometimes Halloween!) trumpet signal to begin their attack. They just don't seem satisfied to have their celebrations and parties and dinners and festivities unless they can recruit ALL of us into their ranks.Actually, we wish them well. All we really want is for them to leave us alone and let us mourn in peace and quiet. We prefer our "Silent Nights" to their "Deck the Halls" and "Jingle Bells." We don't intentionally spoil their fun, it's just that our pain makes them uncomfortable. They've been conditioned to believe that "The Holiday Season" should have no blemish of suffering or lack of frivolity. We must not only bandage our wounds while in their presence, but cover them with taffeta and sequins besides. They are convinced that all we need is to "put on a happy face" and all our sorrows will magically evaporate.In their mad pursuit of happiness, they shoot us with the bullets of shopping, piped-in music, special holiday foods and fragrances, gift wrapping, decorations (especially the angels!), joyous children with happy smiles, cards, invitations, parties and gift exchanges. Any other time of the year, snow is considered a nuisance to shovel and plow through. At the holiday season, though, it is touted as romantic and is linked to sleighs and starry nights in front of fireplaces, snuggled close to those we love.The most devastating bombs they drop into our lives are the images of reunion - times of greeting and hugging folks who are much loved and sometimes not often seen for awhile. They may only be separated by geography; our absent loved ones cannot cross the chasm of loss that looms before our tear-filled eyes. They remind us of things we should be thankful for (and we are more thankful for many of those things than they can ever imagine). They prod us with their spears of delightful togetherness, never realizing that what they celebrate is what we cannot now enjoy. We would not dream of attacking them in these battles for holiday survival. With our noses pressed against the glass that divides us, we actually long to be able to be part of their happiness. We remember the times we joined in their fun and we, too, were part of their army of nostalgia and joy.Our broken hearts and bleeding wounds do not excuse us from being gracious, however. While grief does not give us permission to be rude and selfish, and we take no overt action against their aggression, we are not without defenses in these battles. We can shield ourselves with the armor of dignity with kind but direct and simple explanations: "We understand your need for celebration, but this year we prefer quiet and private reflection and meditation." "Right now it's hard for us to function in large groups and to appreciate laughter and high spirits." "Our energy is so limited; we'd appreciate some quiet one-on-one time with you in a more spiritual atmosphere." We can gently remind them of how important it is for us to remember those we love who are gone. These are statements that clarify our position without judging or criticizing them for theirs. In kind and non-threatening ways, we need to tell them what's good for us, because they won't think of it on their own, and they can use the education.We also can exercise the muscles of our sense of humor. It will take some effort on our part, but so does anything that is worthwhile and good for us. We can teach ourselves not to fall into the trap of thinking that our grief makes us the center of the universe. We can limit our demands that others treat us in "special" and "deferential" ways because of our pain. We can cut them a little slack and remember that once upon a time, we were just like they are now. It's good and healthy for us to review our perspectives now and then and decide if we're being fair and reasonable.We can express our love in simple and unhurried ways without all the frenetic, expensive and often hysterical hype that the holidays can generate. And we must exercise the expression of our love. Grief does not rob us of our ability to love; it reminds us ever more dramatically of our need to both give and receive love while we are here.Whenever we can take some control in our situations, we empower ourselves, and then we feel less like victims in what seems like a war of "peace on earth, goodwill toward men." Anytime we can educate and inform with mercy and compassion, we have given a truly spiritual holiday gift of love that will keep on giving forever.May your season be filled with genuine blessings of peace.Good Grief Resources (http://www.goodgriefresources.com) was conceived and founded by Andrea Gambill whose 17-year-old daughter died in 1976. In 1977, she founded one of the earliest chapters of The Compassionate Friends, an international bereaved-parent support group. In 1987, she founded and edited Bereavement magazine, and in 2000, she joined Centering Corporation as Editor of their new magazine, Grief Digest. Twenty eight years of experience in grief support has provided valuable insights into the unique needs of the bereaved and their caregivers and wide access to many excellent resources.