Are We Dating or Married? – Ezine-Publishing
Are We Dating or Married?
You've convinced me that I want to sign up for your newsletter. Now that I'm ready, what do I do? I go to thesignup box on the current web page and complete the form.But wait... what are you asking for? If you're asking formore than my name and email address, I will hesitate.
After all, if you're going to send me an email newsletter,why do you even need my name, much less my street address,city, state, zip, telephone number, number of people in myhousehold, etc. My email address should be enough. Now I'llgive you my name, because I understand that you'll want topersonalize my email messages. But unless you show me verygood reasons, I'll forget about signing up and go on toanother site that doesn't want a lot of information inexchange for their complimentary report or newsletter.
It's like dating. When you first meet you get only thenecessary information - name and phone number. As you agreeto date, you'll get the address. Later, as you get to knowone another better, you'll start to add more details.
Moving a visitor from lead to customer involves a courtingprocess. You want them to get to know you. They need tolearn to trust you. You need to establish a relationship.That's the purpose of your newsletter. You offer them goodinformation and in return they give you the right to marketto them. As they become more interested and more loyal,they'll move from just a lead to a steady prospect.Eventually you'll "marry" some of your prospects and they'llbecome customers.
So what's your courting pattern? How do you get to know yourprospects? When do you ask for more information -- morecommitment?
For more information on the online sales process sign up forthe complimentary mini course athttp://www.SalesSiteQuickStart.com.Dr. Jeanette Cates is The Technology Tamer and Internetstrategist for small business. She is the author of OnlineSuccess Tactics: 101 ways to build your small business athttp://www.OnlineSuccessTactics.com.
Self-Sabotage – Are We Prisoners of the Past? – Positive-Attitude
Self-Sabotage - Are We Prisoners of the Past?
Many people who suffer from low self-esteem would give
anything to escape their painful feelings of inferiority.
Almost anything, that is.People are reluctant, even obstinate, when it comes to
giving up their illusions of an idyllic childhood.And yet, if we are to break free from our mental prisons,
we must become willing to honor the truth of our personal
history. This is the key to removing our invisible
psychological and emotional chains.Lack of Self-Worth Does Not Develop in a VacuumThere is just no getting around the fact that our core
beliefs about the world and ourselves and our place in this
world are pretty firmly established by the time we are three
or four years old.Lack of parental approval in early childhood exacts a heavy
toll. Low self-esteem, the root of all self-sabotaging
behavior, hangs heavy around our necks for life"I Left All That Behind a Long Time Ago"People are quick to grasp at a simple "Out of sight, out of
mind" escape. Sadly, this is a fantasy. While you can,
indeed, leave home and leave your family life behind, their
influence does not leave you.Negative parental messages carry enormous weight. It is
through these concepts that everything else later on, (i.e.,
for the rest of our lives) is filtered.Clearly then, if these basic messages are more negative than
positive, it is not surprising that we would wind up with a
badly mangled sense of self-worth.A life of self-sabotage and perpetual dissatisfaction is
what results, because we simply do not believe, at a
SUBCONSCIOUS level, that we are worth anything better.Traditional Morality Would Have Us Turn AwayPeople recoil at the idea of finding fault with their
parents. We have many religious, social and cultural
injunctions to honor, obey, respect, forgive, and worship
our elders.These commandments prevent us from looking upon our
caretakers in a less than adoring way without incurring a
tremendous sense of guilt, betrayal and ingratitude. So we
remain unaware.What people fail to appreciate is that it is only by
shattering our ignorance and examining our formative years
that we can come to understand what makes us tick. This
awareness will, in turn, allow us to process any distress so
that we may finally release it. Not ignore it, not
camouflage it, but finally release it.This is all done in a spirit of healing, not one of
self-pity, and certainly not one of denunciation. As a
result of discovering and embracing our emotions rather than
squelching them, we can finally come alive.Not only do we gain a new sense of vitality, but we gain a
new source of wisdom. And our awareness allows us to cut
negative patterns off at their source. You see, we cannot
let go of something if we don't allow ourselves to
acknowledge what we are hanging on to.Rational Justifications Do NOT Penetrate the Subconscious
MindMany well-intentioned people and spiritual mentors will
agree that while injurious things may have been said and
done, we should be mature or evolved enough to understand
that our caretakers were doing the best they could.After all, they didn't mean to hurt us with their harshness
or neglect. Why don't we just rise above it and move on?
Surely we are noble and generous-hearted enough to forgive
them, yes?Well, no, actually. And for two very important reasons.First, this is an attempt to reason things out consciously.
It is a fruitless activity, because it does nothing to reach
and alter the core beliefs and distress that are stuffed
down BEYOND conscious access.And second, the person whose body and/or emotions were
assailed was NOT an adult capable of reasoning things out so
rationally. The early distress lives on unabated.We Cannot Live With the ResultsWe may be able to carry on, but we cannot really live and
flourish while those negative core beliefs remain frozen in
time. The tragedy for so many of us is that they remain
lodged firmly in place today, without our consent and
without our conscious awareness.Down With the Taboo Against Knowing Who We AreRather than continue to justify our ignorance, we must dare
to bring the unconscious to conscious light. There are
compelling reasons for doing so.? To heal a mutilated sense of self-worth.
? To process our present moments through fresh eyes.
? To avoid becoming subtly mean, cruel or sarcastic.
? To prevent ourselves from unwittingly passing on our damage.And finally, and perhaps most compelling of all, if
traditional morality continues to deny us knowledge of
ourselves and our history, our bodies will end up speaking
for us. And this it will do by erupting into disease.
Witness the alarming number of people who suffer from
depression today.Our psychological and emotional disturbances must eventually
surface as some type of physical or mental malady. Or as I
heard somewhere along the way, "If your mouth won't say it
straight, your body will say it crooked."And according to the title of Dr. Alice Miller's most recent
book on the victimization of children, The Body Never Lies.
Time spent digesting any of Dr. Miller's books is time well
spent, indeed.The greatest healing contribution any of us can make to
world is to heal our own wounds, not hide from them or deny
them or justify them. After all, we do want to live and not
just survive, don't we?Rosella Aranda is the author of Sabotage Thyself No More,
an excellent guide to raising your sense of personal worth
and getting rid of self-defeating behaviors.Free Mini-Course at http://www.SabotageThyselfNoMore.com/
Can We Sleep For Three Hours and Still Function Normally?
Can We Sleep For Three Hours and Still Function Normally?
Polyphasic sleep - also known as *Uberman's Sleep Schedule*, consists of six daily naps taken every four
hours instead of one long sleep every night (monophasic
sleep)The naps can last from a minimum of 10 minutes up to 30
or 40 minutes. 25 minutes is considered optimal.The polyphasic sleep concept is based upon the fact that
we have a 4 hour *ultradian* rhythm operating alongside
our normal 24 hour cycle. This ultradian rhythm means that
we go through a complete mini-cycle every 4 hours. Usually
at the following times: 4am, 8am, noon, 4pm, 8pm and
midnight. Have you ever experienced dip in energy at 4pm?Those following the polyphasic sleep schedule usually sleep from 10-30 minutes every 4 hours . This goes on for the whole 24 hours. A modified version of this is also practiced, where 3
hours core sleep in the early morning is followed by 20
minute naps every 4 hours. Individuals can adapt
cycles to better suit their lifestyle.Mammals living in dangerous environments practice the
polyphasic sleep schedule. Their survival may mean remaining
alert to danger throughout the day and night. Astronauts are
also taught it in case they need to deal with emergency
situations. The army also trains some troops in polyphasic
sleep.The type of sleep experienced by polyphasic sleepers is
mostly comprised of stage 5 REM. Thus the earlier stages of
sleep are largely bypassed allowing the user a few more
hours of 'awake time' each 24 hours. This is a gradual
process though. At first the naps may not be largely NREM
which may explain the seven to ten day stage where
some polyphasic sleepers feel heavy, grumpy, spaced out and
can't concentrate.The Advantages of Polyphasic SleepPolyphasic sleep has been called the "sleep of genius"
Famous folk such as Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson,
Napoleon. and Winston Churchill have used this schedule in
some form or another. Many who have trialled polyphasic
sleep have reported feeling extremely creative, although
this state may take some weeks to achieve.The obvious advantage of course is the extra time gained
in each twenty four hour period. If you follow the classic
schedule, six naps of twenty five minutes each, you would be
averaging only two and a half hours sleep!Once you get used to sleeping this way, you can slip into
the sleep state within a few minutes, compared to twenty
minutes or longer for monophasic sleep.Writers, or anyone who needs creativity in their field,
find that sleeping this way allows them to be more creative.
This could be due to the occurrence of more alpha and theta
brainwaves, rather than beta, during their waking hours.Disadvantages?This type of sleep schedule is not recommended long term although there have been some that have kept it up for 6
months with no apparent ill effects. There has been no long
term research done to find out any negative effects on
health.Although its been practiced through the centuries, it's not known whether depressing the other non REM stages of sleep - especially the stages 3 and 4 of deep sleep, may have a
negative effect on long term emotional health.Polyphasic sleep is impossible to integrate into a normal
working day.Oh! And another thing.
Those who have tried it have reported an increase in
appetite which may lead to weight gain. You would probably
need to spend some of that extra time doing more exercise!ConclusionIf you're interested in trying polyphasic sleep, try it
for a while during your next holidays. It won't do any
damage short term, except possibly make you feel tired and grumpy!It is recommended that participants review their eating
habits and make sure they are on an optimum diet with all
the necessary food groups and maybe a vitamin and mineral
supplement.Also recommended is to have a series of interesting
projects on hand to keep the mind stimulated and to prevent
accidental sleeping outside the schedule.Visit our web-site below for a healthier way of
maximising the quality of our sleep in less time. Go to the
"Too much sleep" page.Want to know how to have better sleep? Find out how. Check out http://www.insomnia-connection.com your resource for detailed information on better sleep and curing stress. The author, Wendy Owen, has had a lifetime interest in general and alternative health as well as being an ex insomniac!